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COMING OF AGE - BAR MITZVA

The Jewish tradition combine coming of age with taking on responsibility according to Biblical law. For boys, this begins when they enter their 13th year and become a Bar Mitzvah (son of the commandment); for girls, it’s a year earlier when they enter their 12th year and become a Bat (daughter) Mitzvah.

The Talmud (Oral Law) provides this wise advice: “Until he is 13, I talk to my son about God; after age 13, I talk to God about my son.” Following his Bar Mitzvah, a young man becomes responsible before God for his own actions. The only matter in which he isn’t free to decide is selling property or goods that he’s inherited from his father. This must wait until he’s 20 years old. It’s a safety net because he’s most likely not mature enough to fully understand the value of property.

One further consideration determining a young man’s ability to act independently was evidence of sexual maturity (puberty). If not yet apparent by his Bar Mitzvah, he would not be fully responsible until age 20. If he becomes physically but not sexually mature in the interim, he may be fully independent. If he hasn’t matured physically or sexually by age 20, full responsibility is postponed until he’s 36. Those with cognitive disabilities aren’t obliged to fulfill religious obligations, though they’re still taught.

Ask any under 13-year-old Jewish boy which date he anticipates with the most excitement and he'll undoubtedly say "my Bar Mitzvah". (Under 12-year-old Jewish girls would say "Bat Mitzvah")

This religious milestone in the boy's life is marked by allowing him to publicly perform a commandment he was not previously permitted to. Usually he is called up in the synagogue to read from the Torah, (Moses' Law) or the Haftarah, (the Prophets).

An important life cycle event for a young Jewish boy or girl is the Bar Mitzvah or Bat Mitzvah respectively. A boy is Bar Mitzvah when he reaches his thirteenth birthday, while girls are Bat Mitzvah when they are twelve. However, the girl's ceremony can be postponed to their thirteenth birthday as well. The literal meaning of Bar/Bat Mitzvah is "commandment age" or age of majority.

Historically Bar Mitzvah and later Bat Mitzvah is the ceremonial occasion that marks the time when a young person is recognized as an adult in the Jewish community and is responsible for performing mitzvot. For example before children are Bar/Bat Mitzvah, they do not need to fast on Yom Kippur. However after the Bar/Bat Mitzvah, they are required to fulfill this mitzvah. At the Bar/Bat Mitzvah they are also counted in the minyan, a quorum of ten required to conduct a service.

The Bar/Bat Mitzvah ceremony consists of the young person chanting the blessings, and his/her Torah portion which is the Torah portion of the week. One also reads the Haftarah portion. There are many traditions that accompany the Bar/Bat Mitzvah experience. While the actual day is important and memorable, the years of preparation before are just as enlightening and vital.

Over time the Bar/Bat Mitzvah celebration party has evolved. The custom is to serve a special meal to commemorate the mitzvah taking place. Moreover with extended families spread out over the country, the Bar/Bat Mitzvah is also an opportunity for families to reunite and spend time together.

Children begin preparing for their Bar/Bat Mitzvah by going to Hebrew/religious school some years before they actually turn Bar/Bat Mitzvah age. In fact, some children begin attending afternoon religious school from the time they enter kindergarten. The purpose of going to religious school is to learn about Jewish customs, holidays, history, and the Hebrew language. In the year leading up to the event the person begins more intense training focused specifically on their Torah portion and the accompanying prayers. The day the young person is Bar/Bat Mitzvah is the first time he/she will have ever been called to the Torah. To say the blessings over the Torah one must be Bar/Bat Mitzvah age.

In addition to preparing one's Torah portion the preparatory year serves as a chance for the young person to begin thinking about what being a Bar/Bat Mitzvah really means. In some synagogues the young person may make a commentary on their portion and try to apply the teachings of Torah to their own lives.

After the service, a meal ranging from something simple to a full feast, is held in honor of the Bar Mitzvah, as the celebrant is called. Parents are discouraged from turning the event into an excessive 13th birthday party, however, in order to preserve its religious significance.